Unlocking Deeper Conversations with Purrfect Pursuit: The Power of Follow-Up Questions with Kids

Playing Purrfect Pursuit as a family encourages meaningful conversation and helps everyone learn more about themselves and each other. The game’s thought-provoking questions, developed by a team of psychologists and teachers, are designed to explore crucial areas of child development.

To truly benefit from these questions, parents can use follow-up questions to guide children beyond surface-level responses. When parents follow up on initial answers it helps children reflect more deeply on their thoughts, emotions, and experiences. This opportunity fosters self-awareness, emotional insight, and critical thinking, and can also provide parents with opportunities to guide their children without it feeling like a lecture. 

Here are 9 tips on how to effectively use follow up questions when playing Purrfect Pursuit to encourage deeper thinking, foster optimal child development, and strengthen family connection. 

 

1. Building Emotional Depth

Emotions can sometimes be difficult for children (and even adults) to express or clearly articulate. Therefore, follow-up questions can be useful to help delve into the emotional side of their responses and help them articulate their feelings more clearly. For example, if your child expresses sadness, you could ask,

          “What do you think is making you feel sad?” 

          “When do you feel sad the most?” 

These types of follow up questions can help children build emotional literacy and give parents a clearer understanding of what their child is experiencing by facilitating deeper exploration of emotions and guiding children to identifying the root of their emotions. Understanding one's own emotions is the first step to understanding others and these types of follow up questions can help develop emotional intelligence and crucial life skills such as empathy. 

Follow-up questions to help children articulate their feelings and understand emotions more clearly:

          “Can you tell me more about why you felt that way?”

          “What do you think would help you feel better in this situation?”

          “Have you felt like this before? What happened that time?”

 

2. Encouraging Reflection

Follow-up questions are an excellent way to encourage children to reflect and consider different perspectives. By asking thoughtful follow up questions like,

          “How do you think your friend might be feeling?”

          “What do you think you could have done differently”   

you encourage your child to consider different perspectives. This helps them step outside their own thoughts and emotions and understand how their actions or words might impact others. It fosters empathy, a key component of emotional intelligence, by teaching children to recognize and respect the feelings of others in various situations.

This type of reflection also encourages critical thinking by allowing children to explore different potential solutions to present and past problems. It empowers them to take responsibility for their actions and consider proactive steps they can take to manage challenging or difficult situations. Instead of focusing solely on the problem, they learn to look forward or back and think about what positive actions could be taken. This can help build resilience and a sense of control over their relationships, behaviours, experiences. This type of reflection not only strengthens their relationships but also builds their confidence in their ability to effectively manage difficult and challenging situations and problems they might encounter in their day to day life.

Follow-up questions to help children consider different perspectives and reflect on their experiences:

          “How do you think your actions might have affected others?”

          “If you were in their shoes, how do you think you would feel?”

          “Looking back, what would you do differently if this happened again?”

 

3. Positive Reinforcement Through Conversation

Supportive follow-up questions like

          “Is there anything I can do to help?”

          “Would you like to talk more about it?”  

show your child that you are not only listening but are also ready to offer any assistance and help that they might need. These questions show that you take their concerns seriously and are willing to put in effort to work with them to find potential solutions. By offering to help in this way fosters trust and lets your child know that they can come to you for support without fear of judgment or punishment and creates an open line of communication, encouraging your child to share their thoughts and feelings more freely in the future.

Follow-up questions to show support and build trust:

          “What would make you feel better right now?”

          “How can I help you with this?”

          “Would you like to talk more about what’s bothering you?”

 

4. Avoiding Simple 'Yes' or 'No' Follow-ups

Ideally, when asking follow up questions you want to avoid questions that can be answered with “yes” or “no” as these tend to close off the conversation rather than extend them. Instead, aim to ask open ended questions that elicit more detailed responses and require your child to think about their answers more. For example, instead of asking “Did that make you feel better?”, you could ask “How did that situation change the way you felt”. 

Follow-up questions to encourage detailed, thoughtful responses:

          “What do you think was the most important part of that experience?”

          “How did that situation change the way you were feeling afterward?”

          “What do you think might happen if you tried something different next time?”

 

5. Using Gentle Prompts to Encourage Detailed Answers

Sometimes shy or reluctant children may need a bit more prompting to open up. Prompting involves giving children gentle encouragement to help them expand on their thoughts, feelings, and answers by asking open ended questions. This helps them explore their ideas more deeply without feeling overly pressured or overwhelmed. Gentle prompts like “What was your favourite part of that experience?” or “How did that make you feel afterward?” can help children elaborate on their thoughts without feeling overwhelmed. These kinds of prompts are especially useful for children who tend to give one-word answers or struggle with expressing themselves, as they gently guide them toward a fuller response.

Follow-up questions to encourage shy or reserved children to elaborate:

          “What part of that made you the happiest (or saddest)?”

          “Can you describe what happened in more detail?”

          “What do you think made that experience special or different?”

 

6. Avoiding Judgment

Parents sometimes unintentionally shut down conversations by reacting and responding with judgment. When a child shares something unexpected or difficult, it's important to remain neutral and avoid rushing to conclusions. Instead of reacting emotionally, use a neutral follow-up like, “That’s interesting, what makes you say that?” This encourages your child to keep talking and helps them feel that their opinions are respected, even if it's different from your own. Staying neutral keeps the conversation open and judgment-free.

Sometimes it’s also easy to interrupt or jump to conclusions when you think you know what your child is going to say. However, this can cut off the conversation and make your child feel unheard. Let your child finish their thought before asking a follow-up question. This sets a good example, teaches them respect, and encourages further sharing.

Follow-up questions to keep the conversation neutral and judgment-free:

          “That’s an interesting perspective—what made you feel that way?”

          “Can you explain why you think that happened?”

          “What were you hoping for in that situation?”

 

7. Follow Up Questions as Learning Moments

When children express concerns or challenges in their answers whilst playing Purrfect Pursuit, this can be a great opportunity for learning and growth. For instance, if your child mentions struggling with a task, follow up questions such as  “What do you think would make it easier next time?” can help them reflect and problem solve for future situations. This shifts the focus from the past struggle to future solutions which encourages your child to think about how they can overcome similar challenges in the future. By framing the conversation around learning, you help your child develop a problem-solving mindset. Parents can also use this opportunity as a teaching moment where you can discuss similar situations you have experienced in the past and how you approached it using follow up questions such as “I’ve been through something similar in the past, do you know how I managed it?” 

Follow-up questions to guide children toward learning and problem-solving:

          “What do you think would help you if this happens again?”

          “What is one thing you could try differently next time?”

          “What did you learn from this experience?”

 

8. Transition from Surface-Level to Deeper Conversations

Sometimes, children will give surface-level answers that don’t fully explain their thoughts or feelings. To help guide them toward deeper conversations, follow up with specific questions such as “What specifically made today difficult?” or “Can you explain a bit more about why you’re feeling this way” if they say they had a bad day. This encourages children to move beyond vague answers and explore the details of their experiences. More specific follow up questions invite children to break down their emotions and experiences further which helps move past vague statements and focuses on the underlying reasons for their answers. By doing this, you help them understand and express their emotions more clearly, leading to richer conversations that help you as parents have a deeper understanding of your child’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences. 

Follow-up questions to help children move beyond vague answers:

          “What specifically made you feel that way?”

          “Can you tell me more about what happened right before you felt that?”

          “What was the most challenging part of the situation for you?”

 

9. Following Up on Positive Answers

Follow-up questions aren’t just used for difficult conversations, rather, they can also be used to reinforce positive behaviours and strengths. If your child says, “I felt happy when I helped my friend” you could ask follow up questions such as, “What do you like about helping others?” This follow-up encourages them to reflect on the positive qualities they showed or reported, such as kindness or generosity. Positive reinforcement through follow-up questions teaches children to recognize and value their own strengths, builds self-esteem, and encourages them to continue showing these positive behaviours which are crucial for their personal development.

Follow-up questions to reinforce positive behaviours and strengths:

          “What do you enjoy the most about doing that?”

          “How do you think your actions helped others in that situation?”

          “What makes you proud about what you did?”